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Why do we crave closure?

All In The Mind

2 DAYS AGO
All In The Mind

All In The Mind

2 DAYS AGO

Shownote

Closure can feel like the ultimate solution to help us heal. But is it all it's cracked up to be? Today, we learn about ambiguous loss — the type of grief that comes without closure.  We know navigating uncertainty is tricky, so what practical steps can we take to process this kind of loss? A heads up, this episode touches on some heavy topics around loss and trauma. Guests: Carly DoberPsychologist Dr Pauline BossProfessor emeritus, University of MinnesotaAuthor, Myth of Closure: Ambiguous Loss in a Time of Pandemic [https://www.ambiguousloss.com/resources/] Author, Change and Ambiguous Loss: Learning to Live with Unresolved Grief [https://www.ambiguousloss.com/resources/] Credits: * Presenter/producer: Sana Qadar * Senior producer: James Bullen * Producer: Rose Kerr * Sound engineer: Roi Huberman More information: * The psychology of closure — and why some need it more than others [https://theconversation.com/the-psychology-of-closure-and-why-some-need-it-more-than-others-104159] * Motivated closing of the mind: "seizing" and "freezing" [https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/8637961/] * Beyond dogmatism: The need for closure as related to religion [https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/13674670210144130?journalCode=cmhr20] * Need for cognitive closure, tolerance for ambiguity, and perfectionism in medical school applicants [https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7189591/] * Ambiguous loss [https://www.ambiguousloss.com/] To explore more great episodes from the award-winning psychology podcast All in the Mind with host Sana Qadar, download the ABC Listen app (Australia) or search 'ABC All in the Mind podcast' wherever you get your podcasts. There you'll find more episodes on mental health, trauma, attachment theory, wellness hacks, and family relationships. You'll also hear interviews with experts like Esther Perel, Billy Garvey and Ethan Kross. All in the Mind is created for ABC's Radio National by specialist journalists and reporters at the Australian Broadcasting Corporation.

Highlights

This episode explores why the human desire for certainty can make loss especially difficult to process. Through personal experience and psychological insight, it examines what healing can look like when no clear ending is available.
00:00
Closure is not the same as healing
06:26
Closure does not always heal ambiguous loss.
15:51
Some answers heal, but obsession can harm
25:08
Closure is a journey, not a final answer.

Chapters

When Seeking Justice Makes Closure Feel Even Further Away
00:00
Why Some Losses Remain Unresolved—and Keep Grief Alive
06:26
The Painful Uncertainty Behind Friendship Breakups
12:42
How to Move Forward Without Getting a Final Answer
18:50

Transcript

Carly Dober: ABC Listen. Podcasts, radio, news, music and more. Sana Qadar: This will had come about in the most suspicious circumstances you could possibly imagine. Who gets what when someone dies, and who decides? The difficulty with undue influence oft...